08 Match Reports
20th April v Goldleaf... For the 4th season running Goldleaf blew us out last minute and with pretty much every other Sunday side not startng till next week it was not possible to arrange a game.. even through the Club Conference... shame 'cos the weather was actually quite nice considering the forecast was for a rainy weekend! ..when have they ever got it right? "don't worry there won't be a hurricane.." good old Fishy!
27th April v Shamley Green... with the game in doubt all week due to an unwelcome inhabitant of the ground...no not Moles...new neighbours who insisted that protective netting was erected at Shamley's expense before any cricket could take place..hang on there's been cricket on the green since 1841.. (and now it was nearly seven o'clock..arf!) and the works had been delayed by bad weather, but by Friday all was ok and the game was on..hoorah 2008 begins!!.. Sunday morning and the skies are blue over Kent...ah but the match is in Surrey...so as I ambled along that country lane known as the M25 with the wipers on full speed, headlights on and visibility down to 50 yards i did begin to wonder? Hmmm?...who will Jerricho run out this year?..will our new skip be a top tosser or a proper tosser?.. and whats for tea?...somehow I knew all would be ok and the cricket season has begun!
On arrival we find the smallest triangular shaped village green with a six foot deep, twenty foot long hole surrounded by safety barriers which had been dug by the gasman at mid on!.."that weren't there on friday".. exclaimed the skipper. "S'pose we'll have to add that to our list of alternative ways to score." That wouldn't have been an odd thing to say, but for the fact that the boundaries lay outside two main roads that create the V shape, the white painted boundary line ran across the car park of the village hall and if you hit the garden wall of the house next door without a bounce thats only a four.. you have to clear their wall to get a six! I so adore English Country Village Cricket...best in the world!!!
Anyhow...much hoorahs and spring greetings as Chadwickians Old and New gathered, intros all round as a fleet of Wimbledon Wine Cellar emblazoned vans clogged up the car park and some ladies and children turned up...oh yes!!..."Me Julie" has some company!! ...or so we thought... as they all hastily disappeared to the Red Lion pub across the green!! Very sensible.. they'll fit in!!
Astonishingly Martin "Rocky" Lailey proved to be a proper tosser by winning the toss!!... and then opted to bat... much derision...soon the sound of leather on willow echoed around Shamley as after about 26 deliveries Jerricho finally scored the first run of 2008...soon after Rocky himself scored a run...yes it was to be his last..out caught.. ah the classic Chadwick "Captain's innings"! Toby "The Blade" (or should that be cutlass) Cutler steadied the ship with a second wkt stand of 77 with Jerricho.. wont say who was hitting the runs but when Toby was bowled for 61 the other chap was on 12..sshhh! Play resumed after the first rain break around 3.20.. Jerricho having tried to run out Toby earlier had much better luck with Gamini (ro 1)..and in the next over debutante Andreas (me ol' fruit) Georghiou narrowly avoided the same fate, surviving, only to fall for his maiden Chadwick duck, thus joining a not very elite group! This gave Jerricho another run out opportunity with Nick Fordham, but it was the "great walls" themselves that fell next (for 18) in the 127th over...Another rain break and to give the pitch time to dry an early Tea was taken at 4.16 the oppo skip suggesting we bat on after tea for half an hour or so. Griffith (34no) and Dougall (10) making the most of that opportunity with a 7th wkt stand of 39, with Ali stumped going for the hoick our second debutante Giles ("eeaintno") Looker (22no) strode to the crease with just a couple of overs left, with Joe onstrike and hitting a couple of glorious fours (amazingly none down the gasworks hole in the whole game!) Giles had to wait to the final over for the strike...and Blimey!..didn't he strike!! THREE sixes on the trot, then survives being clean bowled by a dolly lob by umpire Jerricho's interesting interpretation of the "no ball- too high" rule (he was the only one who thought it was a nb) finishing our innings with a non bouncing four smack into the above mentioned garden wall! 162 for 7 defendable or so we thought. Off to a pretty spectacular start as Griffith dismissed their one and three in consecutive balls, 1 for 2 off 4 balls, narrowly missing the edge for the hat trick, Cutler unfortunately dropped their No 4 off Dougall's first delivery, Lailey also latterly dropping the same man which proved costly as this one man band saw out the innings ending 84 not out! (he also dropped their No 8 but I won't mention that!) A Brilliant reaction for a C & B by Dougall revived the spirits and the newbies (Andy & Giles) combining for a run out was also a highlight...but "Pomagne Moment" of the season already, which will be a tough one to beat, was Talpe's first delivery a slow wide long hop punished for 4 and Gam tumbling over landing flat on his mush!! Hysterical!... HOWEVER>>> he too was on a hat-trick as he took two wickets with balls 5 & 6 of his first over, sadly also not successful! And to pour salt...Jerricho also dropped one as they eventually cruised to a 4 wkt win with 4 overs remaining.
To say this first game was "eventful" or "interesting" would be an understatement...It was totally surreal...but a cracking start to a typically english tradition!! A great bunch of lads in "almost" idylic surroundings, a warm and welcoming pub and a great deal of piss taking all in all made the gloomy day totally worthwhile...would definately like to go back. (GF..12th man...yes we had 12!)
CHADWICK 162 for 7 dec (TIME) SHAMLEY GREEN 166 for 6 Result: Lost by 4Wkts
Weather: Wet & Windy Brighter spells. Toss won by: Chadwick (Bat)
Lailey ct 1 Jerricho ct 18 Cutler b 61 Talpe ro 1 Georghiou ct 0 Fordham ct 0 Griffith no 34
Dougall st 10 Looker no 22 Hill King dnb
Griffith 6 0 38 2 Dougall 6 0 31 1 Cutler 7.2 1 29 0 Looker 5 0 22 0 Talpe 5 1 20 2 Hill 5 1 20 0
On to Banstead next week where we heard that a Chadwickian ...."once had sex in the Banstead Mental Hospital with a Swedish Nurse called Anita"... well if she was the nurse who was the patient?
Find out next week!!!
...the rest of the seasons reports won't be this long....promise!....well maybe not...
4th May v Banstead... well, we really needed the old Star Wars gag "May The Fourth Be With You" to ring true ...but sadly not, as yet again we were bamboozled by Banstead! Struggling even to raise a team 8 members and 3 guests took to the main ground...yes those of you who decided to give this one a miss, actually missed out as with no other teams playing we were right there in front of the pavilion and the assembled masses (about 12) that came to watch and be entertained!!..well they had a laugh anyway!!
Lailey again proved to be a top tosser and this time opted to field in this "time" game given that at least the option of batting out for a draw was available if necessary...yeah right...
9 of us took the field with a lost guest Roger Gunesekera being talked in by Jerricho on his mobes and Griffith still in his garden at start time...despite living the nearest to the ground..(2pm unless stated Big Boy!) it was left to a well oiled (that's a mixture of WD40 and Deep Heat) veteran to open the attack, yes that was me (G Fawcett) and as i sit here typing three days later..I still ache like f**k! With my usual mix of early season right arm erratic their opening pair began to open their shoulders until "a word from our sponsor"..Top Banana Andreas..."drop him a teaser outside off"... ok i thought a "teaser"...hmmm.. there it was...slow, short, wide...yes the classic shit ball...and whack! completely mistimed dolly straight to guest Andy "Syk-O" Syk at mid off.. my 1st wicket of 08 and it was all down to the "Big Apple" Andreas! ok ok ok..stop it now... no more fruit and veg puns...sorry Andreas.. i just thought we made a great pear... sorry i meant pair out there! Another C & B from ageless Ali Dougall and a fine low ct behind by Tricky Trevor Perera and they were stumbling at 30 odd for 3, but as always their strong middle order steadied the ship and runs were added freely until a somewhat dodgy lbw decision (their ump!) gave Lawrence Hill his first wkt dismissing their top scoring batsman.With half an hour (or so we thought ) till tea and them on 84 for 5 pinned down by ever reliable (not his timekeeping) and equally unlucky bowling by economical Griffith (if only we could catch he'd have a dozen wickets already this season) skipper Lailey turned to our other guest MA, kindly supplied by Banstead themselves..(who clean bowled their second top scorer and 2 of their tail which included his twin brother for a golden duck!).. and our sponsor.. have I mentioned him before?..Andreas who put in a 24 carrot..er carat..performance also bagging 3 wickets, some excellent appealling for some plum lbw's. Desperate to add to their low tally...(don't know why!? it's only us!)..they batted on till all out (for 157) as "tea at 4.30" became "tea between innings"...don't they realise I'm wasting away..that extra 15 minutes could have finished me off! As always tea was delightful... though i did miss my usual round of abuse as the regular tea ladies were on holiday...still... we'll be back in July!
Anyway, Rocky having seen how well MA had done with the ball decided to open with him and Jerricho, striding confidently to the middle he emulated his twin brother by being clean bowled himself for a Goldie... oh well... a Captain's innings required then! Rocky immediately off the mark with a 2.. though not easy to score of a tight attack...even their scorer commented "um. has Jerricho scored a run yet?" as 10 overs later and a 19 total Jerricho went for 1, clean bowled by Demon Bill Early, his first of a five-fer.
Syk-o up next, really looked the part... actually let me re-arrange those letters...prat...as he wore his thigh pad outside his strides...first nominee of the season for the sartorial elegance award!! Soon back in the hut caught behind for 3 this didn't give Andreas time to veg-etate awaiting his turn..ip. Certainly no "has-bean" despite carrying a knock he didn't need a runner, almost sprout-ing wings as he took his cue.. cumbersomely striding to the middle, leaving his blackberry with the scorer...STOOOOOOOOP!!!!
The skipper fell for a top score of 26 and we were 43 for 5...not looking good! A mini rally with in form Perera starting where he left off last season with a fine 23, but wickets continued to tumble with Gunesekera wishing he'd stayed lost and Griffith probably wishing he'd stayed in the garden as both went for ducks. An 8th wkt stand of 28 from Perera and Dougall added a smattering of hope but with both of them bowled by Early it was left to Hill (more of a mountain to climb) and a creaking Fawcett to bat out the last 12 overs for the draw...yeah it took 7 balls...what a prune.. as we were all done for 92.
As always our hosts were a pleasure to share a beer with and clearly we'll have to get up Early to beat them....not another pun..nets this week lads! Joking aside...well done Andreas...me 'ol fruit !!...arf arf!
BANSTEAD 157 All Out (Time) CHADWICK 92 All Out Result: Lost by 65 runs
Weather: Dull but ok Toss won By: Chadwick (Field)
**MA b 0 Jerricho b 1 Lailey b 26 **Syk ctwk 3 Georghiou ctwk 4 Perera b 23 **Gunesekera ct 0
Griffith ct 0 Dougall b 10 Hill no 11 Fawcett b 2
Fawcett 5 0 22 1 Dougall 9 1 22 2 Griffith 13 2 36 0 Hill 8 0 21 1 Georghiou 5 2 22 3
**MA 4.5 0 17 3
11th May v Medmenham... sorry its taken me a week to load this report...been getting over the shock that we actually WON!!!!...yes the annual trek to the Bucks countryside was finally made worthwhile with a quite convincing victory. 8 Chadwickians and 3 guests faced an equally unrecognisable Medmenham side on a beautifully sunny day in idyllic surroundings...apart from the fact they have yet to get their new pavilion, but at least there was power this year for the urn , and, it has to be said, one of the best teas!
Meds won the toss (Lailey now a useless tosser) and opted to bat starting strongly seemingly scoring fours with ease off our main attack of Griffith and Cutler before their opener fell to a smart C & B Cutler in the 10th over. Pace bowlers struggling with rhythm and balance from the pavilion end due to a "mountainous" dip in the ground bang on the delivery stride, oh how we missed the left arm overs!
Mind you even the change of ends didn't help me...still bowled like a twat! With the score on 93 for 1 they looked like cruising to a big total, but thank goodness Janet let Giles out to play as The Looker bagged his first Chadwick wicket clean bowling their No 3... a few balls later he gets a second thanks to a catch from Andy "syk-o" Syk (we really must get some joining dosh off him!!). Stand-in keeper Martin "rocky" Lailey played a blinder behind the stumps catching everything ...er except the one that was edged.. so it was up to guest Jim Copeman to finally bag the prize wicket of the other opener..for 49.. ouch..! With him gone wickets began to tumble, a dodgy lbw for Copeman, another C & B Cutler, a magnificent direct hit from the boundary for a run out by Roger Gunesekera and Griffith mopping up the tail..156ao!!
Did I mention the tea?...oh right...well..after my sixth scone I sat down to score as usual...but no! secret revealed someone else actually knows how to...Nick Fordham!...it was either that or umpire and he didn't want to don the white coat so out I went to the middle...AND..I took my camera with me..see photos page for the snaps and indeed the evidence of Fordham scoring AND...Griffith learning! Oh Yes!
The old adage of "give the guest a game" proved a result as this boy Copeman (34) could bat! Just as well as the old boy at the other end (Jerricho) went for 3 in the 5th over with the score on 15. Joined by Toby "Cutlass" Cutler (70 no) they put on a 2nd wkt stand of 40. Skipper Lailey (30) joining the cutlass for a match winning 3rd wkt stand of 76 with Looker (10no) supporting Cutler for the last couple of overs to complete a magnificent win over long standing adversaries... now if only we could find "The Flying Ant Plate" we could engrave our name on it at last!!!
MEDMENHAM 156 All Out (Time) CHADWICK 157 for 3 Result: WON by 7 Wkts
Weather: Hot Sunny...lovely! Toss won by: Medmenham (Bat)
** Copeman ct 34 Jerricho ct 3 Cutler no 70 Lailey lbw 30 Looker no 10
Fordham, Hill, **Syk, **Gunesekera, Griffith, Fawcett dnb
Griffith 8.3 1 27 2 Cutler 9 1 35 3 Fawcett 3 0 25 0 Looker 9 2 28 2 Hill 4 0 15 0
**Copeman 5 0 11 2 Fordham 3 0 8 0
PS: On arrival Jerricho pointed out what he thought was their "new electronic scoreboard"... er yeah that was the mains power junction box...and it was BEHIND the pavilion!! (see pics page!)....
